★ disclaimer ;
Vulpecula: the last constellation (in alphabetical order)
Just me and my lonesome, ranting..
About my love life. Or lack thereof.
Layout: You & I
Browser: Mozilla Firefox / Internet Exporer
Resolution: 1280 x 800
★
28 March, 2010 | 8:46 AM
feeling blue, when i'm trying to forget the feeling that i miss you
feeling green, when the jealousy swells and it won't go away in dreams
feeling yellow, i'm confused inside, a little hazy but mellow
when i feel your eyes on me, feeling fine, it's sublime,
when that smile of yours creeps into my mind
♥
i love you, forever and always. let's both put in moar effort to make this relationship awesome! ^3^
But haven't I always loved you?
★
15 March, 2010 | 10:33 PM
i ♥ my boy/boyfriend/baby/love/lover/darling/honey/hubby! ^3^ (i cannot think of anything else LOL) are you sure you will not be sick of seeing me everyday for a week! :x
But haven't I always loved you?
★
14 March, 2010 | 9:45 PM
love, i smell like you as i type this! i love your smell! because it means you're nearby or something :D i do not want to bathe (okay, maybe i just won't wash my shirt so it'll still smell like you but i will bathe hahaha) mmm thank you for today ^3^ wow, you were with me for 12 hours! :O :O so insane. i hope you enjoyed yourself as much as i did! and thank you for being such a TG(TECHGEEK)/obliging slave. my family lurrrrrrrves you hahaha *pinches* not as much as i, though.
i will do my best to be perfect for you, my baby! you are my world (: *hugshugs* *pats* you're awesome ^3^ and no, you don't have to give up your dance sessions. i know how important they are/how much they mean to you. (seriously, you check the forums every what, 1-2hours? and i bet you check it every 15mins at home!)
goodnight, hubby! sweet dreams ♥
But haven't I always loved you?
★
13 March, 2010 | 6:24 PM
bop bop baby please don't let me go ♥
can't live my life this way
bop bop baby please just let me know
and put my mind at ease for sure
i don't know everything that you do, or why you do it
but i know you love me, and i love you
so i'll just keep trusting you (:
But haven't I always loved you?
★
| 1:43 PM
i'm not asking for much, just your time of day :\
you say you love me - i can't feel it. you never tell me anything, like when you wake up, i'm just waiting for you the whole day and sometimes only when i sms you will you sms me back. don't you think i'd like to know when you're up so i can talk to you? you're always busy/out doing things and i really don't have time at all to talk to you. dancing, singing, this that. even today :\ i don't know when your thing started, when it's going to end, i'm just sitting here at home waiting for you to sms me. don't you think that's pathetic? i do. but it's the only thing i CAN do because i don't know what's going on with you, what you're doing, where you are.. i can only wait.
this isn't what i want. all i want is for you to pay attention to me and to care about me, maybe just a bit, but i don't see any of that. of course i do, when you come over and all, but that's it. the rest of the days... it's like i don't exist at all.
maybe we should just go back to what we used to be. friends/acquaintances/fuckbuddies.. it would hurt less, because i won't have the right to demand you pay attention to me and i won't have the right to know what you're doing all the time. wouldn't you like that, not being bothered with depressing comments the whole day and when you're free we can just chat and meet up and be happy. no strings attached, no commitment, no hurt, no nothing. i wouldn't expect you to talk to me all the time or... anything at all.
i just ask of you that you talk to me, even when you're out. when you're having breaks inbetween or have nothing to do for a few minutes; things like that. tell me when you're up, when you go to bed.. what you're doing.. if you can't do that, let me know. i'll stop expecting it of you. please.
is this just temporary? will it go back to the way it used to be? i hope it does. it didn't use to be this way.. we used to be happy. you used to be there for me. i guessed that's changed. maybe i should learn to accept it. i mean, nothing lasts forever.
But haven't I always loved you?
★
12 March, 2010 | 7:54 PM
i don't want to become the kinda wife who just waits for her hubby to return all day... :( it's too tragic. Ah well, you've got things to do too, you can't just laze around the rest of eternity doing nothing (although that would be awesome) i won't hold you down, i'll always be there to support you, whatever you may do (: even if it hurts me. ♥
the wind is blowing and the trees are swaying and le dog(s) is/are barking. it's quite scary. i'm the one who told you not to come but still :\ iunno. i still wish for the impossible, like having no boundaries and stuff. why can't i just do what i want, hmpf. oh well. XX breeds YY which in turn ....... which develops character. the painful journey.. awaits.
But haven't I always loved you?
★
09 March, 2010 | 7:34 PM
But haven't I always loved you?
★
07 March, 2010 | 7:20 AM
this is what i meant
and then i cry ever more when i think about the possibility of ever living without you.
love makes life worth living, because when i'm with you i'm at my happiest. but then i see you and i feel that you really do love me and you really did miss me. i just can't stay angry at you anymore. but i don't want to get mad at you in the first place, because then i get mad at myself and it's an awful feeling.
there are times when i think that it would be less painful if we broke up, so i wouldn't have to feel hurt and neglected and jealous and stuff. but i don't want to because i love you, and i'm selfish. i don't even want to think of you being with anyone else, ever.
rest assured, i won't leave you. i can't, anyway. you're too important to me.
But haven't I always loved you?
★
| 3:23 AM
dear lumpy, i wish i could tell you everything and have davin hear it right now. i wish i could apologise a million times over for what i've said. i'd take it all back, if i had the chance. i wish i could tell you how much i regret that. i don't think i've ever felt worse about something in 10 years. i wish i could hug hubby to sleep, just like i can hug lumpy to sleep. i wish i could just be with you as you sleep, and whisper 'i love yous' into your ear. maybe you'd hear and know how sincere i am. i wish that would make it all okay. baby i'd never let you go and i'm sorry for what i've done. i hope things can get back to normal. as for my grandparents, i don't care whether they hate you or love you because i won't let anything stand between us. (if that sounded mean because i let them hate you, it's not intentional because i do care, but i really won't let anything stand between us. not even my parents, if it comes down to that)
forever and ever? say you'll forgive me
But haven't I always loved you?